Wow. 2 weeks!! I'm sorry. You know it's crazy, that seems like so long, but at the same time, with all of the things that have happened since my last post, I can't believe it's only been 2 weeks. Well, let me see if I can catch you up.
First, I'm not angry anymore. That last post actually did wonders for me. I was able to let go. More importantly, I realized that I was now able to talk to my boys about everything. I'm not going to share what we talked about. I thought about sharing, and there were some really good conversations in there with both of my boys, however, those are going to stay with me and them. I will say this though, my boys are crazy smart and intuitive. They get it from my mom. They see way more than I've given them credit for. Good for them.
OK, next. I had a really crappy day at work yesterday. Why was it crappy? Because it was the last day for one of my staff members. I love my staff. I consider all of them friends, and yesterday one of them moved away. He got a much better job, and he absolutely deserved it. I've actually been telling him for a while now that I couldn't afford him and that he could do better. He finally did and I'm so happy for him. At the same time, I am incredibly sad. He was part of "us". How do you replace that? The short answer is, you don't. The best I can hope for is that I can find someone who doesn't disrupt the great chemistry we have. Well, that's part of my job I suppose, and I'd like to think I'm decent at it, but there are no guarantees. I'm so happy for him, but I can't tell you how many times I've called him a butthead over the last couple of weeks. I sure hope he knows that I mean that as a term of endearment.
What else? Oh, I had a week there where I was actually excited about a woman. It turns out there's nothing there, but it was kind of nice to find out that I could be giddy again. Baby steps I know, but that was a pretty big one.
I'm going to end with this. My mother-in-law (Yes, I'm aware that's changing, but she's my mother-in-law until she tells me she's not)...anyway, my mother-in-law found out today that her skin cancer has come back. I can't tell you how bummed I was to hear that. I know that has been a constant fear of hers for years now, and to find out that it's back, well I can't even imagine what is going through her head. I feel so helpless. I was able to make her laugh a little bit today, which probably did more good for me than it did for her, but I wish I could do so much more. I can and will pray. I don't know what else to do.
Well, I need some sleep. Football starts next week but I'm planning on posting still. Heck, I'm not where I want to be and this is the best therapy I know. Goodnight my 4 readers. Thanks for putting up with me.
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